Insults, and 1reasonwhy.

So, you're in an online game, and someone starts yelling about how something is 'gay'.

Why do they do this? It is not because they are homophobic (most likely) but because they probably don't have another adjective at the ready.

I've been fomenting ways to help fix the situation. We need a script of sorts, of appropriate language. And a script of canned responses to casual sexism...or racism..or other ism.

So what are your favorite gender free, non homophobic, non racist insults?

Some of mine, that I borrow from my Father liberally:

'Jack Wagon'
'Ignorant Spitoon'
'Doorknob'

The whole 'shit' suite is okay. (Shit head, shit disturber)

'Sharp as a bowling ball'
'Odd like a spherical cow'
'Irrational like pi'

So what are some of yours?

EDIT: From my wife 'coprophagic belching donkey'

I used to be #1reasonwhy

This blog post isn't going to be EvE related, so if you're just interested in shenannigans, you are going to have to wait a bit more.

The title says it all. I used to be part of the problem. I'm getting better tho.

A bit of history. I've been doing games for about eighteen years now. And I used to be part of the problem. I wasn't a groper or a creeper. I didn't pre-judge my female co-workers (The few of them that I had). But at the workplace we were rough on each other with insults. Artists were 'bitches' if they complained. I'd casually toss out phrases like "You've got sand in your vag." or "Go choke on a bag of dicks.". And the ever present terms 'pussy' and 'fag' or comparisons to something that is 'gay'.

You get the idea. And I worked on some really good games, that had some *very* bad stereotypes.

Outlaw Golf, Outlaw Volleyball, Outlaw Tennis. Solid games, solid gameplay, serious stereotype overload. I assuage myself a bit now by telling myself the games are parody based and are over the top like that on purpose. (For those of you not familiar...There are some screen images available.)

And then I got married. And then I had kids. Couple of girls. And I realized that these two girls, and my wife, were being lessened by my insults and by my attitude. Comparisons to people to bad female stereotypes in a demeaning fashion demeans the entire group. And that goes for any other stereotype that is based on orientation, race, religion or gender.

So I'm trying to be better, and trying to be part of the solution by calling it out. The casual homophobia, misogyny, racism that peppers the language.

It doesn't take much for any of you reading this. To curb your own language. To *think* about what you say before it drops out of your mouth. And listen to what others are saying and call them out on the casual misogyny and homophobia.

It doesn't take much to stop being part of the problem, and to start being part of the solution. I'm most certainly not perfect. But I am trying. Not for my sake, but for my kids sake. Because I help to form the world they will grow up in. And you do too.

Why aren't there more women in the gaming industry? Because of people like I used to be. When will there be more women in the gaming industry? It will take years, and it will just take all of us to stop and think, and a bit of personal courage to call folks out on their behavior.