This blog post is an amalgamation of corporate 'public' chats...CPR PUB and I.M.M Local. Heavily edited for length and content.
CPR pub is the public channel for CONCORD Preservation and Recovery. Who declared war on Otherworld Empire. I.M.M is the corporation that contains the main for the ceo of CPR. And I.M.M is a member of Systematic-Chaos. All of whom have been wardec'd by the IEEE.
EVE System > Channel MOTD: Welcome to CPR Pub. You are either here because we want to speak to as you are our friend or because we are shooting you. To get us to stop shooting offer us a nice ransom.
Zedrik Cayne > Good afternoon.
Zedrik Cayne > Who is in charge of this bad mistake?
Zedrik Cayne > I'll wait...I am patient.
Zedrik Cayne > At any rate...Who is in charge of all this? I'm too lazy to open the corp show info right now.
Paknac Queltel > the CEO just left
Sumi Ie > i wish i knew who ran this popsicle stand too sometimes, but im too lazy to open a corp window as well
Lord FunkyMunky > ya and we're all in charge when hes gone
Lord FunkyMunky > gets a lil confusing but it works loil
Sumi Ie > lol, taht explains so much!
Zedrik Cayne > Ah...a democracy.
Lord FunkyMunky > no no
Lord FunkyMunky > not democracy
Lord FunkyMunky > we're each a king in our own minds
Lord FunkyMunky > like the other day told sumi we were going to fly south and he told me were going to fly north and somehow we ended up going east
Sumi Ie > and then we still ended up going west
Lord FunkyMunky > lol
Lord FunkyMunky > so whats it u need dude
Zedrik Cayne > You've declared war vs. Chribba.
Lord FunkyMunky > uh ok
Lord FunkyMunky > thats more statement than question
Amadaus Tesla > The implied question is : "What were you thinking?"
Lord FunkyMunky > lol
Lord FunkyMunky > well we were smoking weed and drinking a lot and ya.. seemed smart at the time
Zedrik Cayne > So, who is in charge of that mistake?
Zedrik Cayne > It is very much against published standards and practices to actually dec Chribba..So we are going to open an impromptu investigation.
Lord FunkyMunky > whos this chribba anyway i hear so much about him
Zedrik Cayne > We'll be seeing you in..what...48 hours then?
Lord FunkyMunky > so lets see... 24 hrs we get 24 hrs to deal with pos's then we get to dock up and go to sleep till everyone gets tired of wardecing us not a bad thing i guess
Sumi Ie > epic win for us
Siona Atreus > Our epeen blots out the sun.
Lord FunkyMunky > i mean even if epi decides to close CPR lol, we'd still go down in history as one of the only people to attack chribba i think
Paknac Queltel > The only one foolish enough to try, I think
Lord FunkyMunky > lol
Sumi Ie > id call us fool hardy not foolish
Lord FunkyMunky > didnt we get 1 tower already?
Paknac Queltel > tomayto tomahto
Amadaus Tesla > you might as well go for it. Make some history
Lord FunkyMunky > and considering the insurance prices on t1 ships lately vs price, not like we have much to loose
Prometheus09 > a press release has been released
Prometheus09 > http://www.eveonline.com/ingameboard.asp?a=topic&threadID=1241818&page=2
Sumi Ie > being an eco terrorist has to be the hardest job in eve, no one takes you seriously!
Zedrik Cayne > And if you are going to dock up for the duration of the war...I hope you like the inside of a station.
Siona Atreus > you think with how nice the planets look.. more would take our path
Zedrik Cayne > I've has one corp pretty well continuously dec'd for three months now.
Siona Atreus > i has cheeseburgers
Siona Atreus > cookie, want one?
Zedrik Cayne > I have lots of cookies.
Sumi Ie > you think were gonna sit bored in stations?
Sumi Ie > lol
Siona Atreus > gay porn site cookies dont count.
Ocnathor > you know we are alt corp dont you
Zedrik Cayne > Lord FunkyMunky > so lets see... 24 hrs we get 24 hrs to deal with pos's then we get to dock up and go to sleep till everyone gets tired of wardecing us not a bad thing i guess
Siona Atreus > well, that is one person.
Siona Atreus > -> bio,
Zedrik Cayne > Well...y'all were saying that you kind of all run things as a collective. So i took it as authoritative.
Siona Atreus > mm CEO is the authoritative figure.
Sumi Ie > lol, you took what he was saying seriously?
Siona Atreus > rope a dope.
Zedrik Cayne > Please...The IEEE is very serious.
Siona Atreus > r u stealing music or something?
Zedrik Cayne > That's the RIAA.
Siona Atreus > ah..
Zedrik Cayne > Not the IEEE
Siona Atreus > so..
Siona Atreus > would all of this chatter be considered "carebear acts"?
Sumi Ie > for a guy how bashes carebears in his bio, you really seem like one
Zedrik Cayne > Carebear acts are not strictly against published standards and practices.
Prometheus09 > now no smacktalking people keep it nice and civil
Siona Atreus > rgr
Zedrik Cayne > Let me guess.... Prometheus09 == Epimithius09
Prometheus09 > aye
Some time later after wardecs start rolling in.
Lord FunkyMunky > how bad off are we
Alopecoida > you'
Alopecoida > re fine....we were just bored....there's only 2 of us active really
Lord FunkyMunky > lol
Lord FunkyMunky > its funny how much crap we stired up lol, definitly worth the giggles
Alopecoida > yes thanks
Lord FunkyMunky > da well such is the way eve goes lol
Bela'flek > o/... anything going on tonight?
Epimithius09 > not at them moment
Amadaus Tesla > we found joe the p.
Bela'flek > any chance of undocking my geddon and shooting osmething soon?
Lord FunkyMunky > probably not lol
Bela'flek > :(
Epimithius09 > http://www.eveonline.com/ingameboard.asp?a=topic&threadID=1241818
Bela'flek > kk
Epimithius09 > have a read
Epimithius09 > i take it you dont know whats going on yet
Bela'flek > yeah, read that las tnight.
Bela'flek > anything going to comeof that?
Epimithius09 > 5 so far
Bela'flek > egads
Bela'flek > is this going to be a docking festival for the forseeable future then?
Epimithius09 > im working on it I have a solution
Bela'flek > k.. should I log on as my in-corp alt and read something?
Epimithius09 > yeah
Bela'flek > kk
Lord FunkyMunky > this is histerical in all reality
Lord FunkyMunky > chribba drummed up all this support
Lord FunkyMunky > all these people waisting cash decing
Siona Atreus > phunny
Lord FunkyMunky > only to get well ... hmm.... the pos?
Bela'flek > yeah, sounds like a lot of i <3 chribba me-too-ers.
Lord FunkyMunky > i know u'd think more people wud be against chribba, i mean i know hes a nice guy from what i hear, but come on the dudes got highsec dread, no budys jelous lol i am
Zedrik Cayne > Oh....add me to the list of chribba lovers.
Major Stallion > i ♥ Zedrik tbh
Aresse > me too!
Lord FunkyMunky > ok ok theirs a thread for the I love chribba talk
Lord FunkyMunky > lol
BattleGerbil > so, this is getting even better
BattleGerbil > Joe Phoenix has offered us an alliance
BattleGerbil pokes Zedrick in the eye with a stick. Wake up.
BattleGerbil > oh, wait. It is probably 4am Zedrik's time. He fell asleep, and now has ASDF implanted on his forehead.
BattleGerbil > corp is currently reading the Joe Show
And...even later once shooting starts:
EnderCapitalG > You guys killed anyone yet?
Epimithius09 > us or them
EnderCapitalG > you
Epimithius09 > we have killed each other
EnderCapitalG > The "good" guys :P
Epimithius09 > got 8 osprey kill or so
EnderCapitalG > So, if a POS is "at war", and somebody RR's, it, are they a target?
Epimithius09 > and lost a few BS etc
EnderCapitalG > Oh. Guess so :D
EnderCapitalG > morons don't know how2/eve/
EnderCapitalG > You pew pew chribba's POS up?
Epimithius09 > nah to manny RR
Epimithius09 > about 40ish i think
EnderCapitalG > kill all the RR? lol
EnderCapitalG > too many people sucking chribba's cawk
Epimithius09 > we tired
Epimithius09 > tried
Epimithius09 > then they killed us
Epimithius09 > then we killed them
Epimithius09 > etc etc
Epimithius09 > all good fun though lol
EnderCapitalG > :)
EnderCapitalG > kb link?
Epimithius09 > http://cpr.eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=5203470
Epimithius09 > got to put more up
EnderCapitalG > sweet
EnderCapitalG > I heard about you guys scooping that POS
Epimithius09 > that was fun
EnderCapitalG > those are some shitty fit ospreys.
Epimithius09 > havent looked
EnderCapitalG > no plates
EnderCapitalG > at all
EnderCapitalG > Did they not know that you could shoot them?
Epimithius09 > they proberly did
Epimithius09 > /emote shrugs i dont care
EnderCapitalG > lol
EnderCapitalG > I just find it amusing if they didn't. LET'S HELP HIM ALTHOUGH WE KNOW NO MECHANICS OF PVP
Epimithius09 > not all of them. Noir for instance are good pvpers
And finally, in the I.M.M Local channel
Zedrik Cayne > Hello future wartargets.....I've been trying to get a diplo on the horn for two days now.
Serizawa Kaho > hello fail guy
Serizawa Kaho > so a 18 member corp war decks a 1700 strong alliance?
Serizawa Kaho > find that smart or stupid?
Daquaris > Bear with Kaho, apparently she's celebrating new years early.... And, it's 2800 Kaho, lol.
Serizawa Kaho > ok
Serizawa Kaho > well anyways i still find his logic even worse then mine
Zedrik Cayne > This is not 'logical' it is an investigation.
Cosner > wat seems to be the problem here?
Hallan Turrek > I am also investigating!
Hallan Turrek > Who left this lobster in my pants!
Serizawa Kaho > so thats where i left it
Zedrik Cayne > First of all..its really disturbing to be talking with Cosner
Serizawa Kaho > why is that?
Zedrik Cayne > /emote used to fly with the original owner
Serizawa Kaho > hawkeye?
Zedrik Cayne > No..the original original owner
Cosner > lolz funny thing is i got him cheap
Cosner > under a bil for a 12 mil sp char
Cosner > skills a bit messy but all good now
Zedrik Cayne > At any rate. The reason a wardec has come your way is because one of your members has done something incredibly stupid.
Serizawa Kaho > again do you think war decing a 2800 man alliance is smart/
Serizawa Kaho > ?
Cosner > kaho shh
Hallan Turrek > Intellegence is in the eye of the beholder.
Serizawa Kaho > ok :(
Cosner > ok wat has 1 of my members done
Hallan Turrek > May I offer this: A small corporation will find it easy to be a thorn in the side of a larger corporation. It's hard to crush what you cannot see.
Cosner > btw war decin 0.0 alliance not a good idea we have an alt hauling corp :P
Zedrik Cayne > Wardeclared Chribba
Hallan Turrek > Yeah, this is because of the alt corp of some of your members Deccing Chribba.
Cosner > did he use my corps name?
Hallan Turrek > Unfortunately it's easily traced back to you. The Leader of it never kept it secret that he was one of your alts.
Hallan Turrek > Your being corp members
Hallan Turrek > alliance member, what have you
Cosner > wat is this alt corp called?
Hallan Turrek > He used his alt corp to dec Chribba, and we know who he is. So here we stand, looking at you and wondering why.
Hallan Turrek > CONCORD Preservation and Recovery
Zedrik Cayne > CONCORD Preservation and Recovery
Cosner > nothinik to do with us maybe a members personal corp
Hallan Turrek > It has everything to do with you. It's an alt corp. He's going to stay docked up with that alt until the dec goes away.
Cosner > so plzz tell me y you guys would come into another corps pub channel act like kids?
Hallan Turrek > So that brings us to your doorstep.
Cosner > im missing the point
Kan3r Blaze > Hallan, check corp chat
Cosner > how does it have everythink to do with us?
Hallan Turrek > About ten corps have declared war on your member's alt corp. He's gone into hiding. But we know who he is and where he's hiding. So we're asking for answers.
Zedrik Cayne > Like children? I've been nothing but respectful here. And it has to do with you because you have allowed someone incredibly stupid among your ranks. This has caused the IEEE to take notice and put through an impromptu investigation.
Cosner > oi shh il get to u in a min
Hallan Turrek > Look, in understand your position.
Serizawa Kaho > so a member who is well a member did something bad to you so you take it out on a much larger corp?
Hallan Turrek > He dIdn't do anything bad to me.
Cosner > so let me get this right hallan ur angry 1 of my members war dec chribba but at the end of the day its 2 diffenet corps tht have nothink incommom
Hallan Turrek > I quite like Prometheus.
Hallan Turrek > Angry isn't the right word, See Zed over there? He's angry. You asked a question about why we were hanging out in your channel.
Cosner > as far as i care tht corp is full of newbs i dont put my name on it
Hallan Turrek > I think I've answered that one.
Cosner > zed over there is a fool tbf
Hallan Turrek > I suppose only Zed can answer to that one. ;)
Cosner > [10:13:04] Zedrik Cayne > This is not 'logical' it is an investigation.
Cosner > investigation. of wat
Cosner > i thought u knew everythink b4 coming here or u wouldnt be wasting my guys time or ur time
Cosner > pretty stupiding walkin to a lion den wen its time for food no?
Zedrik Cayne > The IEEE uupholds the published standards and practices for the proper operation of alliances, corporations, and most professions in eve
Serizawa Kaho > then why don't you wardec goons?
Serizawa Kaho > they have none of that
Cosner > im guessing u didnt do ur history of my corp?
Serizawa Kaho > ^
Zedrik Cayne > You have been found harboring at least one person who has been found to be egregiously in violation of said standards
Serizawa Kaho > roleplay?
Cosner > batman its time to go back to the forums nd have a lil look at wat we are nd wat we do
Zedrik Cayne > I will admit to not having done much research...as the violations were so egregious it weas felt that pulling the trigger on an investigation was in the best interest of the universe.
Serizawa Kaho > what he do blow up a carebear or something?
Serizawa Kaho > BTW do you have any hulk pilots in your corp?
Zedrik Cayne > I am a hulk pilot
Cosner > zed im sorry but tht not good enought u have faild at ur mission nd u need to hand down ur hat to the next person no fool jumps off a clif without checking the drop first
Cosner > u mitee aswell just sell ur char
Zedrik Cayne > I am afraid that your opinion of my 'success' holds very little water. But time will tell.
Serizawa Kaho > ok again your a industrail corp who war dec a 0.0 war machine alliance?
Cosner > ur still a newb dressing up as superman
Serizawa Kaho > where is the logic in that?
Cosner > u cant make a diffenets in this game if u just sit back nd have a head the size of a contry
Hallan Turrek > Zed, I must admit this ia bit of an epic troll.
Cosner > :)
Serizawa Kaho > lol
Cosner > well if he did his research first he would expect it no?
Serizawa Kaho > ask around molden heath about I.M.M
Hallan Turrek > Oh lord. You're believing him.
Hallan Turrek > Sorry Zed, keep going.
Serizawa Kaho > show me your boobies?
Cosner > lolz
Zedrik Cayne > Ask around highsec about the IEEE.
Cosner > thts high sec
Serizawa Kaho > i have they all say the same thing
Serizawa Kaho > you give good head no?
Zedrik Cayne > I'm doing a bit of research right now...EXALTED say you are terribad,,,c/d?
Cosner > hears the thing in high sec no one care who u are ur just like the rest of the lemons auto piloting around
Serizawa Kaho > ^
Serizawa Kaho > you know Exalted is fail right?
Cosner > ok best u can come up with is the mom we lost due to spy
Serizawa Kaho > actually exalted calls everybody fail
Cosner > well we replaced it with in hours
Cosner > no biggy
Serizawa Kaho > shut up women get on my horse
Cosner > but the fact lie u have no rep around 0.0 or low sec no one knows who u r
Cosner > so y act like the big bad wolf
Cosner > u can keep huffin nd puffin but my house is made from steel bro
Serizawa Kaho > huff and puff and try to blow down your house just to get your ass kicked by a pig in a brick house?
Cosner > nd yes ur prob right i have a big head
Cosner > but ur the 1 making it bigger
Serizawa Kaho > your getting a hard on
Serizawa Kaho > ?
Cosner > -.-
Cosner > kaho ur a fool
Zedrik Cayne > At any rate...I am certain a chat will be had again.
Zedrik Cayne > Down time and all.
Yes..they thought it was a good idea at the time